To Fall In Love
by starbuckmeggie
Summary: Some things just hit you out of the blue.


The apartment is surprisingly quiet considering all six of us are there. For the moment, we're all actually engrossed in a movie. Rachel is draped across the cuddle chair, Ross is sitting on the floor next to her. Phoebe's on the far end of the couch, Joey sitting on a cushion on the floor. Chandler is propped up against the other arm of the couch, his own arm dangling across the back. I'm curled up in the middle, leaning as close to Chandler as I possibly can without actually touching him. The room is dark, so we could probably get away with being a bit closer if we wanted, but we've had a few close-calls lately so why tempt fate?

I feel Chandler's fingers slide into my hair and goosebumps instantly appear on my arms. He alternates between twirling my hair and gently massaging my scalp and it's all I can do to keep my hands off of him. I covertly glance over at Phoebe, but she seems completely unaware of us. I shift a bit in my seat and let my hand drift across the cushion to him—I'm not bold enough to put my hand on his leg, but my fingers press against his hip, and that's probably the best I can do for now.

I turn my head to him just a fraction and see that he's already focused on me, not the movie. Our eyes meet and I feel my breath catch in my throat. I swallow heavily as my heart starts to race and I realize—I am in love with this man. Madly, crazily, deeply, truly in love.

And for some reason, this sends me into a tailspin.

I've waited my whole life for this, and now that it's right in front of me, it scares the hell out of me.

Maybe it's because I've genuinely never felt like this before. All those times I thought I was in love don't hold a candle to Chandler. He's my whole world; he's everything.

It's definitely scary. It's wonderful and amazing, but scarier than I ever could have imagined.

I suddenly feel very claustrophobic. This is a lot to process at one time.

Wordlessly, I stand up and go to the kitchen. Calmly, I grab the half-empty trash bag and, very aware of the five sets of eyes staring at me, go into the hallway and head for the stars. I go down a few steps before I stop and press my back against the wall, the garbage bag dropping with a soft thud at my feet. I take a few deep breaths, trying to get myself under control.

I don't know why this is such an earth-shattering moment for me. For some time now, I've been pretty sure that I'm in love with Chandler; it shouldn't be that much of a shock. Somehow, though, it is. Maybe it was the realization that this is the only person I ever want to be with, the only person I want to kiss and hug. But still…I should have known those sorts of feelings went along with love.

Maybe what's so hard to deal with is the absolutely certain knowledge that if I don't have him, I'm nothing. Chandler has completed me in ways I didn't know needed to be fulfilled. Without him…I don't know if there's a point.

That's probably the scariest thought of them all right now.

I hear my apartment door creak open and I know it's him. He pulls the door shut and whispers, "Mon?"

I poke my head around the corner and smile at him. "Hi."

He looks relieved that I'm okay as he shuffles toward me. "You kind of freaked everyone out back there. Everything okay?"

It's on the tip of my tongue to tell him how I feel. I want so badly to be able to say it out loud. Instead, I say nothing—it's too soon, and Chandler is too skittish when it comes to things like this. He needs to say something like this first so he won't feel pressured. And that's okay.

Instead, I wrap my arms around his neck and pull him to me. "I just wanted a few moments alone with you. Is that okay?"

"Always," he answers, kissing me softly. "What do you want me to tell the others?"

I shrug. "Eh. Just tell them I couldn't handle the garbage being there. That sounds like a Monica sort of thing, right?"

He kisses the tip of my nose then releases me. "Definitely." He takes a couple of steps back toward the apartment before turning to me once more. "You sure everything's all right?"

I smile once more. "Everything's perfect. I'll be back in a couple of minutes." I look down at the trash bag at my feet. "Can't very well walk back in with the trash."

He disappears back into my apartment, and I lean against the wall once more. A few tears escape my eyes and I laugh softly to myself. "I love you," I whisper, needing to hear it out loud.

Everything is perfect. 

*A/N...just have to say that I kind of love this little moment. Don't know why. It just hits me in the feels.


End file.
